The Toddler Test – Day 1

I stayed up until 12:30 or so last night putting together application materials for a new job. (And skimming my dating apps, all while thinking, “I so don’t have time for this,” and wondering if the Backpacker is going to fade out on me without ever asking me out. Yes, I am a little sad about this.)

Toddler woke up at midnight for water, and then wanted to get up again at 4:30am. I got him to sleep in until about 5:10. Yaaay sleep…. I did tidy up the apartment and managed to do my yoga video in the morning even with the toddler running around, so there was that.

Subbing job today for a teacher I have previously subbed for. I took the job because she put me on her preferred sub list, though to be honest, I had a really difficult day last time I subbed for her, and the school is kind of a long drive out for me. I took the position again because of the combined effects of flattery and guilt (the subbing system kept autocalling me to ask if I would take it). Mistake? Perhaps. But here I am.

My ex flies to Thailand this evening for sexual reassignment surgery. I don’t feel sad about us anymore, but it feels unreal. This is the person I had sex with for nearly a decade.

Evening update (hiding under the blankets and waiting for the toddler to sleep):

I suppose my ex is on a plane now. 

I am really struggling to stay awake this evening. Have to though. I am calling another ABCTE student after the toddler goes to sleep (we are.working toward teacher certification and have to pass some big tests). She is going to study with me over the phone.

Subbing job today went just fine, by the way. The normal teacher was on campus and she was very helpful. She also said I have a calm personality and that is good for teaching. Makes me feel happy. Though it is funny to hear students say they liked me after some of them had a mini-revolt when they didn’t want to do their work (which is what happened the first time I subbed here). Like the teacher said today, though, the important thing in a situation like that is to not react emotionally and exascerbate the situation. Guess I have a decent poker face.


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